


broken inside

by booklover4eva (orphan_account)



Category: NCIS
Genre: Angst, F/F, Implied/Referenced Torture, Sexual Assault
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-15
Updated: 2015-03-15
Packaged: 2018-03-17 21:29:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3544448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/booklover4eva
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>ziva can't stop thinking about abby and reaches breaking point.</p>
            </blockquote>





	broken inside

**Author's Note:**

> random one shot fic. hope you like it.  
> i do not own any of these characters, i'm just borrowing them.

ziva watched as abby danced around her lab, she swayed along to whatever heavjeanine tries out the new simulator only instead of showing someones fears it shows their wants instead. al track was playing. she stared at abby as she danced, watching the swing of her hips and raked her eyes over abby's chest where her pert round breasts were begging to be revealed. so caught up was ziva that she failed to notice abby had stopped dancing.  
abby cleared her throat causing ziva to look up sharply. "you ok ziva?" abby asked  
"yes. why wouldn't i be?" ziva replied.  
"you've been staring at me for the past ten minutes and you had a weird look on your face." abby said.  
ziva felt like she had been doused in icy water as abby looked at her expectantly. she had hoped abby had not noticed her staring..  
"sorry abby i have had alot on my mind and i must have spaced out as you would say." ziva lied hoping abby would leave it at that.  
"what's wrong ziva? you haven't been the same since you came back." abby said concern evident on her face.  
ziva did not know how to reply. how could she tell her that after she nearly died in that explosion, all she could think about was abby and that she would never know how ziva felt about her? or even that ziva didn't even realise how much she loved the goth until that moml  
lllent. when she came back to ncis she was painfully aware of abby and how beautiful she was, and had been forced to remove herself on more than one occasion.  
sometimes when abby flirted with her she would become hopeful, until she reminded herself that abby was straight. it cut her like a knife to know that she could never be with abby. she had tormented herself for months imagining abby with her, and abby had not helped with her constant teasing and rediculously sexy outfits.  
ziva clenched her hands by her side as she ĺllĺin an effort to put some distance between herself and abby.

 

abby grunted in surprise as ziva slammed her against the wall. "what the hell ziva!" abby exclaimed.

"i cannot do this anymore abby, i cannot pretend my feelings are not there." ziva said as her hands roamed abby's body, squeezing and groping her breasts. she then attacked abby's mouth before she had a chance to protest, she could taste the caf pow abby had been drinking earlier. she ran her hands up and down abbys body groaning at how good it felt, she moved her lips down to abbys neck and bit down over her pulse. "ziva you need to stop, this is wrong." abby said. she was shaking and looked scared as ziva continued in her assault. "STOP!" abby yelled as she forced ziva off of her. ziva just stood there panting like a wild animal, her eyes dark with lust. abby stepped towards her and slapped her. "what the hell ziva? why the fuck did you do that?" abby asked her. ziva came back to herself and realised what she had done. abby was stood there with her shirt torn open revealing her bra, and her lips and neck were bruised from ziva attacking her. but the thing that tore at ziva the most was the hurt in abby's eyes as she stared at ziva. "i'm so sorry abby, i did not mean to hurt you. i do not know what came over me." ziva turned and fled down the corridor, away from abby and away from herself. she didn't know what was happening to her, she couldn't conrtol her impulses anymore. she phoned gibbs when she got back to the safety of her apartment, and gave in her resignation telling him she was unable to cope anymore. he didn't press her and for that she was greatful. "ok ziva but take time off to think about it first, i don't want you to regret this later ok?" gibbs told her "fine" she said "i will let you know next week, i have some vacation time due anyway." she told gibbs, she then hung up, sat down on the floor of her apartment and cried for the first time in years. what the fuck was that about? abby thought as she watched ziva dissapear. ziva had been acting weird around her ever since she got back. abby had caught her staring at her for months now and had wondered what was wrong. last week in her lab abby had decided to ask ziva outright what was bothering her. she had caught ziva staring at her again while she had been dancing, the way ziva had looked at her made her nervous though she couldn't have said why. when she asked ziva if she was ok, she had tensed up immediately. ziva had looked crushed when abby told her she had caught her staring at her. when ziva had lied to abby, she was going to leave it at that but something told her to keep pushing. when she asked ziva what was wrong an internal battle seemed to rage within the israeli as she struggled to answer. she saw pain, sorrow and longing flash across ziva's face and hoped that maybe she would finally open up but then ziva had lied again and practically ran from the lab. ziva appeared to be more her normal self the next day though so abbydecided not to bring it up again. something had changed in ziva today though, as if she had reached some kind of breaking point. abby was on her way back from autopsy after hanging out with ducky when ziva had appeared from nowhere and started attacking her. when ziva didn't stop after abby had asked she started to panic. "ziva's trying to rape me." she thought. ziva's hands were everywhere as abby tried to fight her off. when abby finally managed to force ziva off of her it seemed like ziva was going to attack her again so abby had slapped her hard in an effort to bring ziva back. it worked and abby watched as ziva slowly realised what she had done, she had never seen the israeli look so devastated and when ziva had ran she was tempted to follow her, nut instead she went into her lab in an effort to calm herself down. "i have to tell gibbs" abby thought "what if she does it again but to someone who can't fight back?" so she went upstairs to talk to gibbs but he was on the phone. "ok ziva but take time off to think about it first, i don't want you to regret this later ok?" he said into the phone. he listened to ziva's reply and then hung up. he turned around to face abby and his face went from shock to anger "who's done this to you abby?" he demanded. "what did ziva want?" i ask instead. "she's resigned from ncis, now don't change the subject, what happened to you?" he asked. it was then that abby realised that she had forgotten to change her shirt after ziva's attack and that her bra was on show to everyone, she tried to cover up the marks on her arms and neck as she tried to come up with a plausible lie. "i got a little bit carried away with one of the guys from IT." she heard herself say. "well be more careful next time or you could get hurt, now why are you here?" he asked. abby sighed in relief as he bought the lie but then she wondered why she had lied to gibbs in the first place. to protect ziva she decided, there was obviously something wrong with the israeli and abby was determined to find out what. there was a knock at ziva's door but she ignored it, instead she turned around and burrowed deeper into her bed. the knocking continued and got louder and more insistant forcing ziva to get up ands see who it was. she opened the door and nearly had a heart attack as she realised it was abby at her door. "what do you want abby?" she asked tiredly, she hadn't slept since that day in the corridor as the events keep replaying over and over in her mind. how good it had felt to finally touch abby, how shocked she had felt when she realised what she had done and how ashamed she was that she had lost control like that. "i came to check up on you. no one's seen you for three days ziva and i was worried about you." abby stood there looking small and vunerable and it pulled at ziva's heart knowing that she had put her friend through this ordeal and yet she still insisted on making sure ziva was ok. "i'm sorry abby but you need to leave now." she said, she could feel her self control slipping away the more that she spoke with abby. it was so hard being this close to abby and not taking her like she wanted to, she moved to shut the door but abby's foot blocked her. "no ziva, we need to talk about what happened and i'm not leaving until i get an honest answer this time." ziva sighed when she saw abby's look of determination and moved aside to let her in. "why are you doing this ziva?" abby cried as she fought the ropes that tied her to the bed. there was a wild look in her eyes that scared abby and she wanted to break free and run as far as possible but ziva had tied her up too well. ziva ignored her and continued pacing up and down at the foot of the bed. "i cannot deal with this anymore abby." she said suddenly "deal with what?" abby asked "tell em what's wrong ziva!" abby pleaded with her. ziva stopped pacing and faced abby. she looked so anguished that all abby wanted to do was wrap her up in her arms and tell her everything would be alright. "help me abby, i feel as if i am lost and do not know how to get home." ziva whispered. abby felt hopeful that maybe she could get through to ziva before she did anything so she had agreed to do anything to help ziva. ziva smiled at her then but it was a feral smile as she colsed the space between her and abby. if ziva had any neighbours they would have heard the blood curdling screams that echoed from ziva's bedroom but luckily she was alone. two weeks later.... "anything yet?" gibbs asked. it had been two weeks since anyone had seen ziva and gibbs wanted her found sooner rather than later. he remembered the last time he had seen her and felt bile rise uop in his throat as he recalled the damage to abby's body as ziva had given in to all her impulses. even ducky had had diffuculty performing the autopsy without being sick, palmer had not been so lucky and had to go touside multiple times to vomit. "we found something earlier boss." tony said, "a woman matching ziva's description booked into a motel just off the highway, units are already on their way down there now." "oh ziva what drew you down this path?" ducky sighed as he performed another autopsy of one of his friends. fin.


End file.
